I overheard someone talking the other day, and she was claiming she was right because she was logical and the other person was not. It seems that it's common to appeal to whether or not one's position, one's attitude or a particular statement is logical in order to defend what a person is saying. "You're not being logical," a person says, and thus it is implied that what you're saying is either wrong or not worth listening to.

So, here enters one of my favorite questions: "What do you mean by that?"

If a person is appealing to logic for the strength and importance of his position, I would hope that he has a decent grasp on the field of logic. The problem is, I'm not sure many people do. Even less, is my assumption, that people are able to operate this knowledge on the fly and analyze arguments according to their logical training. It's one thing to be able to check the validity of a syllogism expressed in symbolic logic while sitting at a desk with a pen and paper. It's another thing to apply those skills during a conversation.

Thus, when someone says, "Well, I'm being logical," I think a good followup question to ask is "How so?" Do you understand rules of valid inference? If so, does your knowledge extend beyond a simple familiarity with Modus Tollens and Modus Ponens? There is likely more complexity to what a person asserting than can be covered by one or two basic rules of inference. It seems a bit naive to claim you're being logical without being able to explain to someone how it is that you're being logical. So, be careful out there.

If you're being logical then you know how logic works.

You don't know how logic works.

Therefore, you are not being logical (MP)

QED

Note: the first premise is false… I know. I'm trying to be funny, not logical.

I had someone reach out to me to ask how I deal with depression, and I thought I'd post my response. If you or someone you know struggles with depression, I hope that you find these helpful.

1. When you're depressed, *immediately* reach out to other people. I cannot stress this one enough. I have a list of guys that I'll text when I'm depressed. There are probably seven of them. Texting takes little energy, and they typically respond, sometimes even calling me. Your friends need to know you struggle with this and how to respond when you reach out. You'll probably have thoughts of "this will just bother them" or "I just need to deal with this and not burden them." Those are lies.

2. It may not be the case that there is one core issue in your heart that is causing depression (e.g. pride, anxiety, etc.). Sometimes looking fruitlessly for that is depressing, especially when you're depressed.

3. Trying to figure out what is true when you're depressed is a bad idea. Get that set before, and then reflect on that when you're depressed. Any "new developments" are probably lies.

4. Build a lifestyle that mitigates the physical onset of depression: get exercise, spend time with people you enjoy, eat well, etc.

5. When you're depressed, don't slouch or lay down. This may sound like a strange suggestion, but getting up and getting out of the house helps. Go to Starbucks and read, go grocery shopping with a friend. 

6. When you're getting depressed or feeling down, but not in full-blown depression, it is good to preach to yourself. Martin Lloyd Jones has a great sermon on this (http://www.amazon.com/Spiritual-Depression-Its-Causes-Cure/dp/0802813879/). We're quick to forget what Jesus has done for us and who we are in Christ.

7. I have found thanksgiving to be the best producer of joy in my life. The other day I made a list of the people in my family and then started thanking God for their different qualities (e.g. a loving wife who is growing in Christ, my oldest son's compassion, my younger son's resolve, etc.)

8. When you're not depressed, spend some time with God reflecting on different sin struggles you have. Confess them to people who know and love you and work towards repentance.

9. Realize you don't have to fix everything right away. Sometimes depression compounds itself because we get depressed that we're depressed. Relax. God is good and in control, Jesus died in our place for our sins and we'll spend eternity in the world as God intended it - worshipping Him forever through our lives in new creation. You don't have to solve all of your problems in one sitting and get yourself out of depression. Depression doesn't remove you from the grace of God. It's ok. Really. Relax 

10. A great simple prayer to pray, when you're got nothing else, is "God, help me."

There are many different emotions I experience on a daily basis. Boredom is typically not one of those emotions. 

In our age of constant entertainment (distraction), the idea of being bored seems almost unbearable. Yet, I don't think being bored is all that bad. Today, after a long day, I found myself wanting to engage mentally on my late-night drive home even though I had little to no mental capacity left. Providentially, I had left my laptop in the backseat and was unable to play the talk I was planning on listening to on the way home. I spent some time fairly bored.

I did absolutely nothing, and it was everything that I thought it could be.

Timothy Ferris, author of The Four-Hour Work Week, has some great thoughts on effectiveness and efficiency. We have to determine effectiveness before efficiency or else we can get really good at doing unimportant things well. To determine effectiveness, we first need to have a goal. One cannot evaluate how effective something is without a goal that it is supposed to be moving towards.

I think these are great principles to apply as we think about the lives we want to live. In an effort to not waste my life, I'm trying to reverse-engineer my time on this earth. Rather than let my years pass me by, I hope to play an active role in shaping what I do in aligning my life with the faith that I profess. 

In thinking through this, I have been mulling over the idea of having each of my decades defined by a certain theme. I once heard someone say "twenties are for training," and that has stuck with me. It got me thinking on what each decade should be defined by. Now, because I'm on the front end of experiencing this, writing this may prove to evidence a great deal of naivety on my part. If so, the exercise will have proved fruitful in uncovering my ignorance.

I would imagine this is not directly transferrable to everyone's life, but here is what each I'm hoping each decade is for:

Twenties - training, leadership development -- I'm almost through this decade, and that seems to be a lot of what I'm going through.

Thirties - initial steps, failing forward, leading -- In my thirties, hope to be putting the training I've received during my twenties into practice. I imagine there will be a lot of mistakes and failure in this decade that I will have the opportunity to learn from and grow.

Forties - flourishing, leading well -- I'm hoping to start to hit my stride in my forties. I hope to see the things I've put in place flourishing, God willing. After the failures and initial steps of my thirties, I hope to have grown and developed into a leader that sees the beginnings of success.

Fifties - writing, training -- While continuing to lead and develop the things I've put into place, I hope to be training people to carry the torch. Also, I would love to spend time writing. With 20+ years of experience and life since my twenties, I hope that I would have acquired wisdom and will begin to be able to produce works that will benefit those who come after me. My sons will be in their twenties and early thirties, and I hope to spend a lot of time walking with them as they go through this time I'm currently experiencing.

Sixties - leading leaders -- I hope to spend time helping people develop who are in the initial stages of implementation.

Seventies - finishing -- I hope to go out in a full sprint, so if I go home to be with Jesus in my seventies (or, if due to strength, 80s, 90s...), I hope it's doing a mixture of everything I've been doing up until this point.

Some may have the objection that doing this is ungodly or evidences a lack of trust in God; I'll deal with that in another post.

(Note: this is primarily thought through in an occupational/ministerial sense. It would do me well to do this same exercise for my relationship with my wife and my family, my personal life and character, etc.)

"I don't believe in luck. Luck is pagan." I'm going to attribute that to Matt Chandler, though I'm not 100% sure on the exact source.

When I heard that, it made me start thinking about the things we say. As a Christian, I have definitely wished people luck (within the last 48 hours, nonetheless). Yet, I don't believe in luck. I also don't believe in coincidence, but that's another word that I use.

After thinking about it a bit, I decided to start integrating the word Providence into my everyday speech. I'm a little less sure how to replace "good luck." I'm using "I hope it goes well," but a blessing would also be appropriate, though it would feel a bit awkward. I don't think some Protestants are particularly good at using blessings.

This may sound like I'm being overly-sensitive, or needlessly thinking about what I say, but I want to speak in a manner that is consistent with what I believe. Also, I think it helps turn my thoughts towards God, and that's a good thing. 

Any other common examples of things we say but don't mean?

 

Getting rest is difficult when you're trying to take care of yourself. Add a spouse, and it becomes more tricky as it is essential for both of you to rest. If you throw young kids into the mix, it takes a lot of intentionality, planning and good boundaries to make sure one stays emotionally, physically and spiritually healthy.

It's easy to make time for rest after someone crashes, but the trick is figuring out a regular rhythm so we can run the marathon of life as a marathon and not a series of haphazard sprints.

I'm sitting in my aesthetics class listening to a lecture on Foucalt and the death of the author. Class has another 30 min or so and then I'm driving back from LA. 

People are good at budgeting different things. Some people keep meticulous track of their money and have full savings accounts and no debt. Some people manage their time well and do important tasks effectively and efficiently and get things done on time. Others manage their talents well and find success in cultivating the unique ways in which they're gifted. There are people who manage relationships well and have good boundaries, deep friendships and a healthy social life.

Being good at one area doesn't make you good at all of them, and everyone has an area that they can grow in. Usually, our friends can see it and call us out on that area. Yet there is one area that we can squander and waste with seemingly no consequences: our minds.

What do we think about? What goes through our heads? I think most of us would be terrified of someone being able to track our thoughts for the day. It's a relief that people aren't able to do that. Yet, we each are able to do just that -- track our thoughts.

Have you ever considered budgeting your mind? We have a limited amount of mental capacity each day. What do we use it for? Learning? Processing? Analyzing? Planning? Absorbing entertainment? Worrying? Obsessing? Empathizing? Understanding? My guess is that we have little idea where that capacity goes on a daily basis. Like many other areas of life, we can either be passive in the life of our minds and let circumstance and others dictate how we use our mental capacity, or we can take an active role in shaping the life of our minds. 

I don't mean this in strictly an intellectual sense. The mind is more than a storehouse for ideas. It affects who we are and what we do. Romans 12:1-2 connects transformation with the renewing of one's mind and this is not an isolated case. The question, then, is this: What kind of role are we taking in monitoring, budgeting and shaping our thoughts?

A duck sitting on the smooth surface of a pond looks very serene, very relaxed and calm. However, if you look closely at the bird, you can see its little feet paddling like crazy under the surface of the water. I'm like that. From a distance, I imagine that I seem fairly calm to others, but most of the time, there's a lot going on inside. This turns out to be one of my greatest strengths and one of my greatest weaknesses. There are times that what goes on in my head produces thoughts, ideas, writings and words that benefit others and honor God. I have a strong ability to fixate on something and work to figure out a solution to a problem or find a different way to say something. Yet, when this ability goes awry, I end up fixating on something that no amount of thought can solve. I turn the problem over and over in my head to no avail and waste copious amounts of mental and emotional energy on trying to work out different scenarios and permutations.

A better word for this is "worry."

Call it "analyze," though, and you have a free ticket to go ahead with this kind of self-inflicted mental torture that spurns the sovereignty, goodness and omnipotence of a loving Father. For me, this is incredibly draining and constantly available. While I'm seeking rest in changing my circumstances to get the perfect amount of time in the perfect place with the perfect activity, I actually continue to carry with me the very thing that is keeping me from rest. My hope is that I would actually be the opposite of the duck -- busy on the outside, but, upon closer examination, found to be calm, serene and controlled. I don't want this to come from some naive detachment from reality, but from deep-rooted spiritual change that sustains me in all circumstances by grounding my hope and trust in God. I wonder if this is what it looks like to abide, to truly rest. I want that constant, prayerful open channel of communication with Jesus that I may truly abide in Him. May God give me the grace to work to make it so.

"Learning to pray doesn’t offer a less busy life, it offers a less busy heart." -Paul Miller

In relationship, especially in the close-quarter life sharing of family, it's easy to get fed up and frustrated with others. Or worse, you can become ambivalent towards them.

Faults, flaws and frustrations are always on the surface of any meaningful relationship. Because of this, they're immediately apparent as we share life with one another. If we're not careful, it's all that we end up focusing on. The evidences of God's grace in the way He has made and gifted us lie much deeper in who we are. Thus, we have to dig a little in conversation and spend time reflecting in order to truly appreciate those wonderful intricacies.

The other day, I made a list of things that I was thankful for in each member of my family. I found that it enlarged my affection towards them. I was at work at the time, and I had a strong desire to leave and go home right then. Unfortunately, an important meeting kept me late that day, but the exercise still proved helpful. There is much to be thankful for, and yet I find that I can all too easily miss it.